It's a blur
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After what felt like an exceptionally long week, I did the chores on Thursday so that once I had finished work on Friday I could slide into the weekend. I needed it. I ended up reading ‘ Why be happy when you could be normal’ by Jeanette Winterson over the weekend. In the book Jeanette talks a lot about home and how we create our home space so that we feel safe and loved and as a result of our search for love and safety homes can take many different forms. A home that is true to it’s occupants is unique and different, no two are alike. I think because what society expects a ‘happy home’ to look like we can find it hard to sometimes say what it is we need in our home space. In a weird way I felt comforted by what she wrote, admiring her courage as she acknowledged that she was searching for how to have love in her home space but in the mean time she had created a space where she could feel safe ( the front door always has to be open) until she could be in a place where she can let love in. The comfort I got from this is a I have created a safe and loving space, unconsciously. There is the obvious, the partner, the dogs, the walls of the house and the garden but there are other things as well. Things that I take with me when I travel, the parts of home I take with me. These were the things I turned to when I was struggling when we were away. It was weirdly knitting and watching drag queens (yes I am a big fan) and escaping into a book. A strange combination but one that made me feel safe and gave me a bit of love when I needed it.
Saturday rolled around and I was determined to be outside all day. I had the day to myself which in itself was a bit of tonic. Some days you just need to be off. When we were away I did a couple of long walks and I had forgotten how much I like a good long walk. We walk the dogs which is never a stroll but more a wander where you are often heading in directions unplanned as the pups pick up their messaages from the fence post message board. I walk to work which serves a purpose - parking is insane where I work, it is better for the environment. It’s also 20 minute stroll. So I started my day with a walk. It did have a purpose, the farmers market. I was late getting started which meant I was late to the market which meant I missed getting the veggies that I was after. I did enjoy the stroll so it wasn’t completely in vain.
I confess that I have not done much work in the garden so far this season. I’ve become obsessed with seedlings and I was advised that I needed to wait until Labour weekend before I could plant anything in the garden and so I decided this year to listen to those that are a bit wiser than I on the gardening front and hold off doing any planting until later this month. I have many seedlings which are quietly taking over. Each week I check and pot up those that have their second set of leaves. This has kept me amused over the past couple of weeks and I am quietly enjoying the focus and peacefulness that comes with pricking out a tiny seedling. This is followed by the magical wonder of watching the seedling grow into a happy little plant. Saturday I thought it was time to turn my focus away from seedlings and do some weeding as weeds were starting to appear. I decided weeding was order of the day. It felt good to be in the garden working away. I worked on the flower beds by the hive. It was lovely having bees streaming in and out of the hive, a steady buzz of movement. Bumbles buzzed about, little ones sare starting to appear in the garden, the first generation of the new nests that are in the garden. Always a comforting sight. As a gardener I feel like I am doing something right knowing bumbles have made nests in my garden. A black bird felt comfortable enough to follow me around the garden, fossiking in the beds I had recently weeded, making the most of the worms which had been disturbed. It was good to work in the garden but it was even better to be part of something bigger than myself. I cherish my garden. The thing I like the most about my garden is being part of a community of insects, of bugs and of birds. Those moments when we are all in the garden together doing our own thing are the moments that mean the most.
One of my dear sweet readers commented that to follow the story of us moving to our dream land was something that was of interest so I thought a quick update might be in order. Whilst on our travels I directed us to have a stop in Cromwell with the purpose of visiting Arbol homes. Arbol homes are designed on various eco principles and are made on sit, then transported to your location. They are also small houses. All of these things were ideas and thoughts that we were wanting in our next home. We have looked at a number of properties. Most have a huge house on them which would require an intercom system to find each other and the few small houses we did see we quickly realised were of poor condition. So we decided to have a look, to see if it was a good fit for us. If at the moment we couldn’t find land and a house maybe we will have found a house and then the land will follow. Sometimes things unfold in an order that doesn’t follow logic. The visit went well and I can safely say we have found what we are looking for. To stand in a house which was designed with so much thought towards the enviornment was just the best. It felt really great to see and hear someone talk with passion about principles that seem so logical when it comes to creating a home but for some reason here in NZ seem so hard to achieve. So we left our visit with the knowledge that while we don’t have all the next steps to our new home and land sorted we had made an inspiring start and hopefully the universe was hearing that we are serious about our plans.
They have an open home in a couple of weeks so we are going back to have a look at the finished interior where hopefully I will remember to take some photos.
The Dance of the Dying Tulip
